[Discuss-sudbury-model] Thank you Alan and Scott re R rated stuff, etc.

From: Sally Rosloff <sallyr_at_socal.rr.com>
Date: Sat May 15 18:16:01 2004

Thank you both of you. Your replies speak to me and are
helpful. Especially the anecdotes Alan, really make this issue come to
life for me. Your comment at the end about the reactions being disturbing
rather than the images themselves does get to the heart of what is
bothering me. It clarifies a concern that was murky for me but now I
realize is the one about when kids do have a reaction disturbing to them
and they don't have what they need in their environment to process it. But
what free schools are about is creating that environment that is supportive
and that is where I am turning my focus. So your reply is helping me to
clarify some of my assumptions that I was not completely clear about.

I was assuming schools would not have XXX rated films around so I asked
about that as a hypothetical in a child's home or elsewhere, as a question
trying to get at the thinking about any limits around age. This isn't a
burning question for me but I did wonder from some of the discussions I've
read about if anyone sees any boundaries (is that the right word, perhaps
limits) at all according to age.

Scott, your replies as well get to some of my assumptions that I am
re-examining. Thanks for explaining about how it must feel to be
constantly explaining, defending the model to folks who not only don't
understand but also might be hostile.The charter school I've been a part of
has gone through some of that and we have students at our school whose
parents really don't support what we are doing but keep their children
there anyway and it's a very confusing message to the kids. I'm wondering
if there is something I can say as when I post as a tip-off that I'm not
part of that group!

You've got me thinking about developmental stages in a new way. I've been
involved in schools where using a "developmental" approach seemed to me to
be light years ahead of a traditional approach...but now of course I am
looking at free schools as light years ahead of anything else!

So I am pondering, thanks again for your food for my thought.
Sally

At 05:03 PM 5/15/2004 -0400, you wrote:
>Sally,
>
>You raise several interesting questions.
>
> From a school point of view, a student is a student is a student. While
>guilds/clubs/corporations can set regulations for the use of equipment
>and other resources, they need to be relatively objective standards,
>without regard to age, in my opinion.
>
>I wonder how many democratic schools would allow unrestricted access to
>XXX-rated videos, of the kind you mention the 7 year old boy having
>seen. Probably none.
>
>My youngest is now 18. She and I have always shared an interest in
>edgier material, understanding that "edgier" is a relative term. As a
>young, young child, we used to watch "Eerie, Indiana". As she got older,
>it was "Buffy the Vampire Slayer". (Of course, we also watched "7th
>Heaven"...go figure!)
>
>When she was one and a half, she came to see me in a community theater
>production of "Chicago". I played Mary Sunshine, which in the musical is
>a male dressed as a female, who gets unmasked at the end. At
>intermission, she came down with her mother to the Green Room. I picked
>her up and held her as a group of people were talking. After a while, I
>said something fore the first time. She looked up at me in shock and
>burst out crying! (We are thinking that she is almost ready to enter
>Regression Hypnosis Therapy to figure out what was going through her
>mind when she heard her father's voice coming out of a woman's body!
>
>The next year, at two and a half, Kelly came to the dress rehearsal of
>"Sweeney Todd". I was the first person to be killed by Sweeney. It was
>rather dramatic as the chorus was singing, Sweeney was bellowing, and I
>got into the barber chair. He laid a white sheet across me and "slit my
>throat". Blood came pouring out of the fake razor we had made and down
>the white sheet. He pulled a lever and my lifeless body slid down a
>chute into the Meat Pie shop below. As I hit the bottom of the chute I
>heard a voice cry out, "Daddy!!" Fortunately it was intermission time
>and she came down to the Green Room and saw that I was OK, though for
>the next few weeks she did not like me going to my "Sweeney show".
>
>I relate all this to say that she has not been scarred for life, but
>rather is an incredibly rounded, creative, intellectual, dancing,
>singing, writing, caring, scholarly person. My belief and experience is
>that it is not the images that are disturbing in and of themselves, but
>it is our reaction to them that is disturbing. Granted, some images are
>more likely to provoke a disturbance and some are more likely to provoke
>peacefulness. But the disturbance is no more IN a gory image than the
>peacefulness is IN a picture of the sunset. The emotions reside in us.
>
>~Alan Klein
Received on Sat May 15 2004 - 18:15:29 EDT

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