Re: DSM: "The purpose for which [Sudbury] is formed ..."

From: Vserda@cs.com
Date: Fri Feb 01 2002 - 16:56:49 EST


Hi everyone,
A few points--Some governments, like the one in Ontario, do not let people do
nothing all their life--they force them to look for a job or do community
service.
Besides the point, I have an uncle who for most of his life has done
"nothing". He is 60, used to smoke, get drunk, watch pornography, do puzzles,
whatever he wanted all the time, and still lives with my grandfather and is
supported by him financially. Now he is diabetic, has only part of a tooth
left, no money to pay for dentures or eyeglasses. He was married once (he was
handsome and charismatic), and quickly his wife left him after he did
"nothing" for months, and they lived on welfare. He is the supreme example of
an adult, raised in an authoritarian school and society, who on becoming an
adult would take no responsibility for himself. This is not the model I want
my daughter to admire.
I believe that children, if given freedom from the early years, will use that
freedom to find their way, and will not absolve themselves from
responsibility when adult. The same applies to touch and attention with
children--the more an adult touches them and cares for them, the more secure
they will be growing up.
I also feel that parents do have a responsibility to the health of their
children. I have a 5-year-old who gets pinworms often (accompanied by
sleepless nights, screaming pain, etc.), and I feel that after letting her
try to keep her own diet in check I will have to impose rules. I don't see
any difference in allowing children to eat a whole bunch of candy, for it
will affect their mood, their happiness, their immune system, their relations
to others, etc., for it acts like a drug. Unless, of course, you would allow
your 5-year-old to do heroine. :-)
There are limits on the freedoms adults can give children, and each person
has their own idea of it. Whether with SVS, or other situations, true freedom
can only be aspired to, and as long as we keep trying, I think there can be
no better goal.
Victoria Serda

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