John Axtell (
Tue, 06 Mar 2001 09:26:08 -0800

With all due respect to you fine wife,

I disagree with her.

The person doing the spanking did not create anything, just fulfilled the
desire of a
masochist or in reality probably just invoking the agreed upon punishment
for the infraction.

Her response is typical, unfortunately, of those in her profession. They
believe that outside forces cause the "illness". The person doing the
spanking did not cause the problem the person who violated the "rules" did.

I fundamentally disagree with the logic behind your wife's statement.
Because we put people in jail for doing a crime and that some of those
people desire to return to jail does not mean that "society" created a sick
individual since others do their best to not return to jail. The problem is
created by the way the individual chooses to respond to the outside

When your wife said - "You've just created --" she puts the ability to
create in the hands of individuals outside the person doing the responding.
Is this really where she believes all power resides, outside the person and
there is nothing in the person that is responsible or capable of "creating"
a positive or negative result? I would love it if she were right but my
experience with others unfortunately has shown me that I am not capable of
invoking such power as much as I would enjoy it.

John Axtell

"Walter Thiessen (Connweb)" wrote:

> > Punishment is defined by the person being punished. I know kids that
> spanking
> > was the highlight of their day because they were finally the center of
> > attention. Fear is not a very effective motivator but it may, in some
> cases, be
> > a good controller, or preventor of behavior.
> I ran your quote by my wife. She's a retired psychotherapist, and her
> comment was, "Oh great, you've just created a masochist!"

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