Re: DSM: Re: Re: About offering something (was: dancing)


Dannyasher@aol.com
Tue, 23 Jan 2001 20:54:44 EST


In a message dated 1/20/2001 7:23:42 PM Eastern Standard Time,
kristin@harkness.net writes:

<< I think there is a difference between offering to share your own activities
 and offering someone an activity which you have designed for her/his
 benefit. The first speaks from your own interest, and is in the nature of a
 gift ("I really like this, perhaps you might as well"). The second makes a
 statement about what you think another person 'ought' to do, and is
 generally not an activity which you would pursue even if the offer is
 politely refused. Life would be poor indeed if we stopped making the first
 sort of offerings to each other. However, the second kind of offering makes
 two judgements about the offeree(s): one, that you believe that they have a
 need or lack in some area, and two, that you believe that they should
 address this need or lack with a different priority than they themselves
 have applied to it (otherwise, they would be approaching you). It is this
 second kind of offering which I believe Sudbury model schools are wary of
 making. >>

Thank you Kristen for the fine way you explained the distinction between
offering your self to students or friends and sharing what you are interested
in contrast to setting up classes that you think they should take. The
latter is what so many adults think is their duty to provide their children
and what we at SVS don't do. However the staff is constantly sharing their
knowledge with others at the school in the same manner that any friends
interact. No enticing or guiding is involved. I have difficulty
understanding why some folks conclude that SVS is a blank place with no
content where the staff does nothing. People naturally do things, or talk
about what interests them all the time and the students who know us well are
always aware of this. They also do things and talk about what interest them
all the time. Sometimes they interact with staff and sometimes they don't.
But the place is like a beehive of activity and conversations and it is alive
and interesting.

Hanna from SVS



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