RE: DSM: Interest increasing?

Joe Jackson (
Sun, 7 Jan 2001 11:22:36 -0500

> How would any child learn to talk without first
> being exposed -
> enticed - or preemptively directed by an adult - to express a
> verbal sound to
> ask for something?

A core question.

I have never, ever *tried* to expose my children to anything. I figure the
vast majority of what they have they got from looking around at us end
everything else. The rest they ask people about.

Linda and I have been careful to never, ever encourage or persuade our kids
to talk or read, and yet they are both reading at 6 & 8. When my son
learned to read in about 10 days flat last fall, I responded with
flabbergasted amazement not because I was trying to "positively reinforce",
but because I was not trying to hide my reaction.

One macro example of my experiences are at the school, where certainly
students are never encouraged to do anything, and yet the school consists of
all of these hundreds of activities and classes where stdents are teaching
themselves things I'm certain you and I could not figure out how and where
they got exposed to it...

These (and about a hundred other similar experiences) have all proven to me,
over and over again, that kids will learn what they need to without us
making their lives a living hell.

> As a parent I have always done my best to expose, or as you would
> say -relish
> in the deceptively-benign insidiousness of adult interference for all my
> children. To have children without enjoying insidious
> interference would seem
> to put the function of parents into nothing more than sexual
> objects producing
> offspring for the benefit of the offspring rather than having any
> benefit to
> the "parents".

Not to second-guess you as a parent, but my experiences inform me that your
kids would have gotten what they wanted *and more* if you had not chosen to
operate like that.


> I am probably missing the boat in reading all these posts but I
> sure am trying
> hard to figure them out. Please give me some help if you can.
> John Axtell

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