DSM: Re: RE: Re: laws

Heidi Barker (hbarker@mtaonline.net)
Sun, 7 Jan 2001 00:23:25 -0900

> It's not so much that they feel "lost", but that they feel like they have
> control over their environment without ways of protecting their personal
> space, as well as protecting their rights to do things and use things
> without someone (bigger) taking it away from them.

    The written laws of the SVS model are clearly a vital part of the
system. In thinking about all this I'm learning about SVS, I wondered if
there were any way to apply some of what I'm learning to my family's life
right now, seeing that going to an SVS type school is not going to happen
anytime soon. The next day I suggested to my six year old that we come up
with "house rules." All who could participate (me, my husband and our six
year old, not the two year old just yet), suggested rules as we ate dinner
that night, then I typed them up and posted them on the fridge. It's funny,
but I immediately felt more relaxed and I expect my son must have, too.
When a rule is broken, we can refer to the house rules, discuss the matter
and move on. We know that change to a rule and adding a rule can only
happen after discussion. I can see now that not having expressed, written
rules can be confusing and threatening because they can change without
notice, be forgotten or ignored, or not be perceived in the first place.

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